I’ve said this before but it’s been awhile. Sometimes God allows men and women in our lives who possess many of the qualities we seek in a mate: God-fearing, intelligent, no baby mama/daddy drama – oh, I didn’t mean to share my list. Ha! Antyway…We meet this person who has many of the things we’re looking for on our list and we often don’t know how to behave ourselves. In our zeal we may prematurely express our affections possibly ruining what could’ve been a great friendship or we put words in God’s mouth (“God said you are going to be my wife!”). There are times when God does speak but too many of us use statements like the one above to manipulate someone to our will. Slow your roll, saints.
You ever think maybe God wants to see how we behave when we feel we’re so close to what we’ve been praying for? Some of us only spend time talking to God about our future spouses. We are extra-consecrated as we pray but lose our minds when a prospective suitor comes along. Thoughts are all jacked up. Motives too. We become consumed with what could be instead of what is…or rather He who was and is and is to come. Ladies, we’re so busy planning a mental wedding (and other things) to someone who hasn’t even acknowledged an attraction to us. If we are still in “maybe” land and our thoughts are consumed with her/him how will we behave when someone actually shows interest?
I bring these things up not because I’ve only observed it in the lives of others but mine as well. I am guilty of being consumed by the possibilities of “us”. I’ve planned a few imaginary weddings in my time (that’s a shock to some of you..smh). What has always come to me via that still small voice is “Do you think I’m pleased?”
Ouch. Probably not, Lord. Actually I should go with definitely not.
I have come to view these guys who possess a few of my specifications as a “preview of the promise”. They come after those days when Deacon Rawley tries to win me over in Walmart parking lots with promises of pension checks and AARP vacations. Those days when I turn my face to heaven and say, “Seriously,God? Is this what I’m pulling?” after someone approaches me in my neighborhood with a beer in hand and a bag of chicken bones trying to convince me that we are having “a special moment”. (It happened….seriously.) It’s after those experiences that God sends me a “preview of the promise”. It’s His way of saying “I know it’s taking awhile but I’ve got you covered. I’ve heard every heartfelt request – the serious AND silly ones. See this person with several of your specifications? I GOT you!”
So in this phase of waiting I’m thankful for those “previews” and pray that I will be a good steward of those friendships that may form, while allowing God to maintain a place of honor in my heart.
Seriously though, how many “previews” do I have to sit thru?